The “Should” ParadoxYou promised yourself today would be different. The task was clear, the time was blocked out, and you even felt a flicker of motivation this morning. But now it’s hours later, and you’re still circling it—thinking, overthinking, avoiding, starting and stopping, doing anything but the thing. You know what needs to happen… so why can’t you make yourself do it? If you’re a creative person, this inner conflict may be all too familiar. It’s not laziness or a lack of desire. Instead, it’s often an invisible tug-of-war between your intentions and the complex inner workings of your brain, emotions, and personality. Let’s demystify that tug-of-war. We’ll explore why this happens from a neuroscience perspective, how the creative personality intensifies it, and what you can do about it, compassionately and effectively. What’s Going On in the Brain?Even when you want to follow through, when you’ve made a to-do list, carved out time, or told someone your intentions, your brain may still push back. This isn’t a flaw in your personality. It’s a combination of neurobiology, wiring, and survival instincts. Understanding what’s happening under the surface can help you work with your brain, not against it. 1. Executive Dysfunction: Too Many Tabs Open The prefrontal cortex handles high-level tasks like planning, decision-making, and self-control. But when it’s overstimulated, by internal chatter, emotions, multiple creative projects, or a flood of sensory input, it burns out quickly. For creatives, whose minds are often filled with visions, connections, and overlapping deadlines, this can feel like trying to open a new document with twenty already running. You know what to do, but the “start” button won’t click.
2. Dopamine and Reward Prediction: The Motivation Gap Dopamine isn’t just about pleasure, it’s about anticipating rewards. Your brain releases it when it expects a task will lead to something desirable. The more novel, exciting, or clear the outcome, the more dopamine floods your system. Tasks that are repetitive, uncertain, or emotionally risky, like editing a story or replying to a tough email, don’t trigger that reward signal. For highly creative or neurodivergent brains, which crave stimulation and thrive on new ideas, the lack of immediate dopamine can feel like hitting a motivational brick wall.
3. Threat Detection and Avoidance: The Amygdala Alarm The amygdala’s job is to scan for danger. When it perceives a threat, like potential failure, judgment, shame, or even success that might change your life, it can send your system into fight, flight, freeze, or fawn. From the outside, this can look like procrastination. Internally, it’s a survival response. The task you “should” do might feel threatening on a subconscious level, and your brain is doing its best to protect you from discomfort, even if that means avoiding progress.
4. Default Mode Network Overdrive: The Wandering Mind When your brain isn’t focused on a task, the default mode network (DMN) takes over. It’s responsible for introspection, imagination, and memory, essential for creativity, but a challenge when you’re trying to focus. Creative thinkers often have an overactive DMN, which can make task initiation feel like swimming upstream. You sit down to work, and instead find yourself brainstorming a novel, replaying a conversation, or designing a new studio in your head. These inner detours are not failures, they’re signs of deep cognitive activity that simply needs redirecting.
The Psychology Behind the PauseCreative resistance doesn’t just live in the brain, it’s also shaped by your inner narrative, emotional memory, and personal history. The hesitation you feel when facing a blank page or unfinished task isn’t random. It’s the psychological residue of how you’ve learned to protect yourself, make meaning, and move through the world. 1. Self-Sabotage Scripts: “That’s Just Not Me” Many creatives unconsciously carry identity-based narratives that keep them stuck. You may have been labeled “scatterbrained” or “undisciplined” early on, or internalized the idea that creative people can’t be structured or consistent. Over time, these beliefs become self-fulfilling. You might abandon a project not because it’s too hard, but because some part of you believes that finishing isn’t in your nature. The inner voice that says, “Why try? You’ll just drop it anyway,” isn’t truth, it’s trauma dressed as personality.
Creatives are idea-generating machines. That’s a gift, but it can also be a trap. Too many choices, what medium to use, which story to tell, what to prioritize, can overload your cognitive system. The brain burns energy with every decision. When you spend your day choosing between dozens of equally valid creative directions, by the time you sit down to do the thing, your mental fuel tank may already be empty.
Sometimes what looks like procrastination is actually self-protection. That task you keep putting off? It might bring up fear of imperfection, criticism, or exposure. Vulnerability is baked into creativity, and avoidance is often a strategy to delay discomfort. You’re not lazy. You’re responding to a task that carries emotional weight. Whether it’s shame from a past failure or anxiety about being seen, your pause is trying to keep you safe.
Creative work requires emotional labor. When you're operating under chronic stress, whether from external demands, internal pressure, or simply life, it’s common to experience motivational shutdown. Your nervous system can’t stay in high gear forever. When it senses overwhelm, it may hit the brakes as a form of survival. This looks like disinterest, numbness, or fatigue, but it’s actually your body trying to recover.
Through the Creative Personality LensYour creative brain is a wellspring of innovation, emotion, and insight, but those same gifts can also make consistency, follow-through, and traditional productivity especially difficult. What looks like procrastination or avoidance is often a reflection of how you’re uniquely wired to think, feel, and create. Let’s reframe the struggle by understanding it through the lens of your creative temperament: 1. Big Vision, Small Steps: The Intimidation Gap Creative people often have extraordinary capacity for imagination. You don’t just see the next task, you see the whole world that task could build. The final painting. The polished essay. The perfectly orchestrated launch. But the more vivid your end vision, the more overwhelming the starting point can feel. The gap between your idea and your current capacity creates internal friction, one that can breed avoidance, perfectionism, or doubt.
Many creatives experience the world with heightened emotional and sensory awareness. You might deeply feel the weight of your own expectations, a sharp critique, or even the energetic shift of the room you're in. This depth is powerful for art-making, but can be taxing when it comes to initiating or finishing tasks. A seemingly simple action, like sending an email or sharing a post, can feel emotionally loaded.
For creative people, work is often personal. When your creativity is tied to your identity, doing it wrong can feel like being wrong. That fear doesn’t always sound loud, it may whisper things like “I’ll do it when I’m more ready,” or “It’s not quite the right time.” This isn’t laziness, it’s protective. It’s a subconscious attempt to avoid the pain of not measuring up to your internal standard.
Creative energy isn’t linear. It arrives in bursts, inspiration, flow, momentum, and then it recedes. Our culture rewards consistency and speed, but your natural creative rhythm may be cyclical, seasonal, or intuitive. When you try to force your rhythm into rigid molds, you may burn out or shut down. But when you learn to recognize your cycles, you can begin to plan with them, batching during your flow, resting during your low tide, and offering yourself grace in between.
The Power of Not Wanting ToSometimes, the reason you’re not doing something isn’t because you’re stuck, blocked, or broken, it’s because you don’t actually want to. And that truth can be surprisingly hard to admit. In a culture that glorifies productivity and doing what you “should,” not wanting to do something is often dismissed as laziness or defiance. But for creative people, who tend to be deeply intuitive, values-driven, and emotionally attuned, resistance can carry real information. 1. Resistance as Inner Wisdom Not wanting to doesn’t always mean avoidance. It may mean misalignment. Maybe the task is outdated. Maybe the project doesn’t reflect who you are anymore. Maybe the goal you’re chasing was never your dream to begin with, it was someone else’s version of success.
Sometimes we confuse the tension of “I should” with the truth of “I want to.” It’s easy to miss the signal under the noise. Inner conflict sounds like: “I should want this.” “Everyone else is doing it.” “It would be stupid not to.” Inner knowing sounds like: “This doesn’t feel like me.” “I’m exhausted just thinking about it.” “I light up when I imagine something else.” You may be fighting for motivation when what you really need is permission, to shift, release, or revise your priorities. 3. The Gift of Letting Go Not every good idea needs to be completed. Not every opportunity needs to be seized. Sometimes, the most powerful creative act is deciding not to continue with something that no longer fits. Letting go isn’t failure, it’s clarity.
Because not wanting to can be just as powerful as knowing what you do. Mental-Health-Informed SolutionsHere are practical, gentle strategies designed to support your brain and honor your creative spirit: 1. Build Executive Support Use time-blocking, alarms, and body doubling (working alongside someone else) to offload planning pressure and stay anchored in the moment. 2. Chase Micro-Rewards Pair low-dopamine tasks with small joys: a favorite playlist, tea, or checkmarks on a visible list. Give your brain a reason to stay engaged. 3. Soothe the Nervous System When anxiety blocks action, calm your body: try box breathing, somatic grounding, or a quick walk. Regulating your body makes motivation more accessible. 4. Reframe the “Should” Shift tasks from obligation to choice: “I should email that client” becomes “I choose to reach out and share my work.” This aligns with intrinsic values, not guilt. 5. Shrink the Starting Point Instead of “paint the series,” try “set up the easel” or “make a brushstroke.” This lowers the activation energy and tricks your brain into motion. 6. Make It Visible Use a kanban board, visual planner, or post-it wall. Seeing progress externally builds momentum and makes abstract tasks tangible. 7. Therapeutic Support If these struggles feel chronic or overwhelming, therapy (especially with someone who understands creative minds or ADHD) can help untangle deeper blocks. A Real-World Creative StruggleOne client, a gifted writer, came to me after months of stalling on a project she was once passionate about. She described hours of “preparing” that never led to writing. Together, we uncovered a blend of perfectionism, fear of visibility, and dopamine depletion. Once we broke the task into micro-actions and reframed the project as playful instead of performative, she began writing again, not from force, but from flow. Final Thoughts & InvitationIf you’ve ever felt frustrated by your inability to “just do the thing,” you’re not broken. Your brain is complex, your personality is nuanced, and your creativity is powerful. The space between knowing and doing isn’t laziness, it’s a system waiting to be understood. Try just one strategy this week. Don’t overhaul everything, just notice. Experiment. Be curious. And if you’d like guidance that’s personalized, gentle, and rooted in mental health and creativity, explore the Creative Empowerment Pathway, where we’ll turn “shoulds” into sustainable action, together. Why You’re Stuck (And What To Do About It)A Creative's Cheat Sheet for Getting Unstuck🧠 Your Brain Might Be…
🛠 TRY THIS: ✅ Use time blocks and Pomodoros ✅ Break tasks into micro-steps ✅ Pair tasks with novelty or a reward ✅ Write your next physical action step down 🧠 Your Feelings Might Be…
🛠 TRY THIS: ✅ Reframe “should” as “want” or “choose” ✅ Set a timer for just 10 minutes ✅ Use grounding tools (breathwork, movement) ✅ Limit your daily decisions, simplify 🎨 Your Creative Personality Might Be…
✅ Honor your rhythm and add small rituals ✅ Use a visual planner or wall calendar ✅ Define “done” in flexible, creative terms ✅ Practice imperfect starts (build momentum, not masterpieces) ✍️ Reflection Prompts
Other Articles Like Why We IgnoreHealing Through Creativity, Truth in Fiction, My First Year in Horse Therapy, Routines that Work, The Meaning of Life, No, Hope isn't Toxic, Creative People and Horses, Successful but Unfulfilled, Creative Personality Paradox, Anxiety Legacy of 80s Babies, Healthy Weight, Creative Life, Horse Therapy for Creatives, Should I Quit Social Media for Creatives, Creativity and ADHD, Boundaries for Creative People, References 1. Arnsten, A. F. T. (2023). The role of prefrontal cortex in cognitive control and executive function. Trends in Cognitive Sciences, 27(4), 251–264. [https://doi.org/10.1016/j.tics.2023.01.005](https://doi.org/10.1016/j.tics.2023.01.005) 2. Christoff, K., & Fox, M. D. (2023). Twenty years of the default mode network: A review and synthesis. Neuron, 111(1), 5–23. [https://doi.org/10.1016/j.neuron.2023.01.007](https://doi.org/10.1016/j.neuron.2023.01.007) 3. Clear, J. (2018). Atomic habits: An easy & proven way to build good habits & break bad ones. Penguin Random House. 4. Khan, M. A., Latif, A., & Javed, A. (2025). Cognitive-behavioral therapy for procrastination, burnout, and academic stress: A randomized study. Frontiers in Psychology, 16, 1163057. [https://doi.org/10.3389/fpsyg.2025.1163057](https://doi.org/10.3389/fpsyg.2025.1163057) 5. Maher, C. A., Williams, M. T., Olds, T., & Dumuid, D. (2025). Effectiveness of exercise for improving cognition, memory, and executive function: A systematic umbrella review. British Journal of Sports Medicine, 59(3), 215–223. [https://doi.org/10.1136/bjsports-2025-106789](https://doi.org/10.1136/bjsports-2025-106789) 6. Steel, P. (2007). The nature of procrastination: A meta-analytic and theoretical review of quintessential self-regulatory failure. Psychological Bulletin, 133(1), 65–94. [https://doi.org/10.1037/0033-2909.133.1.65](https://doi.org/10.1037/0033-2909.133.1.65) 7. Tye, K. M., & Sierra-Mercado, D. (2012). The adaptive threat bias in anxiety: Amygdala circuitry and behavior. Behavioral Brain Research, 229(1), 10–21. [https://doi.org/10.1016/j.bbr.2012.01.045](https://doi.org/10.1016/j.bbr.2012.01.045) 8. Vartanian, O., & Chen, C. (2024). Executive functions and divergent thinking in young adults. Creativity Research Journal, 36(1), 15–23. [https://doi.org/10.1080/10400419.2024.1964812](https://doi.org/10.1080/10400419.2024.1964812) 9. Aron, E. N. (2024). Sensitivity is about depth of processing. The Highly Sensitive Person Research Blog. [https://hsperson.com/sensitivity-depth-processing/](https://hsperson.com/sensitivity-depth-processing/) 10. The Decision Lab. (2024). Decision fatigue (choice-overload bias). The Decision Lab. [https://thedecisionlab.com/biases/decision-fatigue](https://thedecisionlab.com/biases/decision-fatigue) 11. Cleveland Clinic. (2025). How body doubling helps with ADHD. Cleveland Clinic Health Library. [https://my.clevelandclinic.org/health/articles/25032-body-doubling](https://my.clevelandclinic.org/health/articles/25032-body-doubling) 12. Chen, Y., & Pong, J. (2024). Exploring the role of perfectionism and psychological capital in procrastination. Acta Psychologica, 241, 103899. [https://doi.org/10.1016/j.actpsy.2024.103899](https://doi.org/10.1016/j.actpsy.2024.103899) 13. Friar, O., Dan, Y., & Schultz, W. (2025). Dopaminergic action-prediction errors serve as a value-free teaching signal. Nature Neuroscience, 28(2), 132–141. [https://doi.org/10.1038/s41593-025-01341-y](https://doi.org/10.1038/s41593-025-01341-y) (c) 2025 Creatively, LLC
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get more from The Creativity CoursesLiking educational topics and knowing what's hot in creativity? Creatively has online courses, with an interactive creative community, coaching sessions and more in the Creativity Courses. Want these blogposts in a newsletter? Subscribe here, and get a free gift. Cindy Cisnerosis a Creativity Coach, Creative Therapist and Professional Artist in Sykesville, Maryland. She is an expert straddling the realms of arts, creativity research, psychology, therapy, and coaching. She provides Online Creativity Counseling in Maryland and Virginia, and Online Creativity Coaching throughout the USA, Canada and the UK tailored for the discerning, imaginative, artistic, and neurodiverse. The information provided in this blog is from my own clinical experiences and training. It is intended to supplement your clinical care. Never make major life changes before consulting with your treatment team. If you are unsure of your safety or wellbeing, do not hesitate to get help immediately.
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