 Authenticity in Creative PeopleCreatives, I toyed for awhile with several topics for today- and decided upon another snapshot of your amazing creative personality. It’s gonna be a short one today but what we may lose in length we will make up for in potency and relevance. So, here it is: Have you ever been called independent, adventurous or even oppositional? You may not be surprised to find out that “going your own way” is another fundamental part of your creative personality. A Creative Personality is OriginalLogically, this makes sense: Creative People have to be bold, brazen and independent enough to go against the grain, innovate and create something new. It takes questioning everything, going against the current and daring to be different. It also makes us stubborn, beholden to none, afraid of commitment and crappy with dates/times/deadlines/absolutes. A Creative Personality Dislikes ConstraintsSound like you? You like to flow with your feelings- go when you want to, stop when you are ready. You are spontaneous. You may also find that events scheduled on your calendar loom and may actually have a feeling of dread and heaviness associated with them. Rules even in the form of deadlines and appointment times to be places can feel confining, restricting and interfere with your ability to respond to your flow. Embrace your Creative PersonalityUnfortunately, Creative, there is no cure for what ails you. Your best bet is to face your struggle like you do everything in life- with passion. Embrace this quality- its enthusiasm, its curiosity and capacity to absorb and feel the world around you. You may be able to reduce deadlines and scheduling in your life and be more spontaneous, or you may not. Either way you have what it takes to do things according to your own schedule, or rise to the occasion when expectations are set out for you by others (even if you may not relish it the same).  Get Started TodayThere are tricks I can teach you to dread less, schedule better, set goals more and be both regimented and organic in the way you live. Creativity Coaching and Creativity Counseling are designed to make you and expert on your Creative Personality so you can live well and reach your dreams. Take one of these steps to get started today: 1) Join my Artists in Residency Program. This is a Free, Online Community of Artists where you can build support, accountability and a network of Creative People as a stepping stone towards reconnecting and committing to your authentic, creative self. 2) Book a Free Consultation. All new clients to Creatively, LLC are entitled to a 15 min, free consultation to sit with me and discuss your needs, services available, and we can problem solve and hand-pick best next steps to help you succeed. 3) Book a Coaching Package. Are you a working Creative in need of specific support? I offer a range of Coaching Packages- let's get started with one that is right for you. (C) 2022 Creatively, LLC www.creativelyllc.com More Articles Like "A Creative Personality Snapshot": Hello, Creatives. In addition to working with Creative People one of my clinical specialties has been working with anxiety disorders- and for many reasons it is not uncommon for creative people to be anxious. So, in this week’s Creatively Blog, I bring you a self-coined term I have identified from working with anxiety to help you understand some ways you may be compensating.
Let’s start with some basic information about anxiety. Anxiety indicates a physiological aroused state where your body- to varying degrees- is perceiving and preparing for a threat. Anxiety is an emotion that activates your limbic system- some of your more basic brain functions live here- something I talk about in session as “lizard brain.” More or less, anxiety acts as a switch, either activated or inactivated. The prevailing psychological model for reducing anxiety is exposure response prevention, or, gradually reducing sensitivity to physiological arousal to perceived threats. Anxiety can be summarized as how sensitive our body is to activating emergency response mechanisms when a threat is perceived- and this sensitivity is largely inherited but also can be impacted and changed by life events (eg trauma). A frequently used set of terms in anxiety treatment are “triggers” (what makes you anxious) and “coping skills” (how you manage that anxiety). Some of these are fairly universal and some are more individualized. A coping skill that I see a lot, and that is frequently subconsciously used, is increasing the level of control (type A, much?) to offset the feeling of anxiety. An exacerbation of this relationship can be seen in classic OCD presentations. Anxiety is not always bad and in fact evolutionarily the emotion functions to keep us prepared and safe. Unlike many other emotions, it is not an emotion that you can “stop” from doing- in fact trying to “stop” anxiety may worsen it. Ultimately the best anxiety strategy is to not over-attend or feed into the cycle; allowing it to run its course, and reducing its overall severity and disruption is key. For more about anxiety, reference the “Pet your Inner Cat” blog post about self soothing and self care- a place I usually start treatment with most of the anxiety diagnosed clients that I treat. For more about anxiety and creative people, reference the “Creative People, Anxiety and Intuition” blog post. Now that you have some basic information, let’s move on to the phenomena I started to observe. Like many things in clinical work, I noticed it together with a patient during a breakthrough in session, which allowed me to see it again with another patient, and then another, and so on. Before I knew it, there was a behavior or series of behaviors I was watching my anxious clients engage in as a way to cope with their anxiety, which ultimately once labeled could serve them to identify the worsening or a change in their anxiety symptoms. What I noticed I began to call the “Control Perceived Imbalance Correction” or “CPIC” (pronounce see-pick). In my overview to anxiety I said that subconsciously many anxious people balance or offset their anxiety with control- they believe- usually erroneously- that by increasing control over something they can also increase control over a different thing. Often we feel excess anxiety about things we cannot control, and to offset this it feels good to take control of something else. For example- a person may be feeling anxiety about increased tension in their marriage- a perceived loss of control- and so to correct this imbalance they binge eat- an over use of a coping skill psychologically used to restore control or correct the imbalance. Sometimes there is a sense of self-fulfilling prophecy or self-sabotage- someone may be feeling a loss of control of personal finances, and to correct the perceived imbalance of control go on a shopping spree. On a psychological level they are taking control by doing what they want with money, but in a literal way of course worsening the stressor. CPIC is one, driven by the emotion of anxiety and not by logic, and two, is usually subconscious, and this combination can be problematic. Once I see this relationship with a client, I can help them identify the imbalance correction (eg overspending, overeating etc) and this can be used by the client to pinpoint the source of stress in the future and change course sooner. This is one reason why in therapy I will usually ask you about your week- anything unusual? How have you been sleeping, eating, etc? I am looking for evidence of changes in your life. CPIC is a bit more of a cerebral concept, but, I have found it very useful to my clients once applied. It is certainly something easier to unravel individually by example and through deduction and fact rather than hypothetically and conceptually in writing- and so I invite you to come sit on my couch and learn about yourself, Creative! Come start creating your best life. (C) 2018 Creatively, LLC  This week’s post is again inspired by clinical themes I have been seeing this month.
At this point I have published enough yummy articles on my blog that they gorgeously cross reference and complement each other- in this way this topic is related to many others- so when it speaks to you and emotionally connects with you, I encourage you to pull the thread and browse some of the other topics and past blog articles. Today we are going to talk about the psychological concept of distress tolerance. In simple terms, this is our ability to stand still in a certain intensity of stress. I don’t mean change it, avoid it, or do anything with it- simply tolerate it. This underused but powerful skill allows our emotions to communicate their vital messages and naturally dissipate- freeing us to stand empowered in our lives to make better choices for our own happiness. It takes the power from variability and the unexpected and allows us large scale emotional peace and freedom. (I will give you the caveat that if you are in crisis, severe stress or worse, then tolerance is not your course of action. If you are unsure how this topic applies to your levels of stress, give me a call and let’s talk). In several past articles, I have referenced the biological function of emotions to communicate chemical signals and messages between the brain and body. In an ideal biological and natural sense, whenever we have an emotion we would fully express it and allow our brain and body to absorb its lesson (interested in the topic of the biological functioning of various emotions? Browse those past blog posts!) What happens instead is we feel emotions with an intensity we don’t like and avoid or bottle up, we absorb sociological lessons about which emotions we are allowed to express or not (different for males and females traditionally), we lose touch with what are emotions are, what they are telling us or how to feel or express them. This diversion has the unintended consequence of weakening our distress tolerance. What I am saying to you is our sociological adaptation to avoid emotions has weakened our ability to handle stress. This is unfortunately not to our advantage. Think about exercise as a parallel here. What we are doing is avoiding exercise because we don’t like it, which has the unintended consequence of making it harder for us to take the stairs when the elevator is out. Just like we build our muscles by slowly increasing our physical activity, we can regain our ability to tolerate stress by acknowledging and feeling emotions when they happen in smaller ways, and doing nothing else with them. Ultimately what our emotions “want” from us is to be felt without resistance. This allows them to fulfill their function. Emotions, as the communication signals they are, naturally crest and fall. If we don’t feed them, fight them etc, they communicate their signal in whatever intensity, then fall away. If we simply acknowledge and feel them they naturally dissipate. To begin repairing and strengthening your distress tolerance try a version of this exercise: pick precipitating events of small emotional weights and allow the accompanying feelings to crest and fall while you simply experience them and survive. As your distress tolerance builds in strength you begin to experience stronger and stronger stressors without becoming overwhelmed or destabilized. You are free to make choices about action or inaction and how you can better shape the variables in your life. The end consequence we are going for here is (as always) empowerment to create a life that is happy and fulfilling. How strong is your distress tolerance? What are your personal patterns of emotional avoidance? Want to regain control and build towards more peace and happiness in your life? I can help! (C) 2018 Creatively, LLC  Why is your creative teen self harming?
Self harm is a scary thing to see, hear or talk about, but it is nonetheless prevalent among today’s teens. If your teen, one of their friends, or other young people you work with have talked about it, you may feel unsettled, unsure and alarmed. In today’s blog post I want to dedicate some space to starting to demystify this behavior and talk about why it exists, the purposes it may serve and how to address it. Let’s start with some developmental psychology to set the stage of why the classification of behavior known as “self harm” is so prevalent among teens: Teens are children who, due to the natural societal progression in age milestones, have more stressors. They are more socially aware of friendship dynamics, they are beginning to question, identify and build independence and self-esteem. They have demands at school and are becoming aware of learning strengths and weak points. With all these things at play, their stressors have increased. However, they are still children, and their ability to handle the added emotional response to these new stressors may not have grown with them yet. In other words, they have lots of feelings, without necessarily more ability to deal with them (think an older stage of toddler temper tantrums). Along with growing stressors and limited control over emotional responses, teens are in a unique stage of neurological development where the separate hemispheres of the brain, while still building connections separately, do not yet have many pathways that connect them (think dirt roads vs super highways between the spheres). This means limited executive function capacity. Limited multitasking. Slower neurological processing time. Slower to make higher level connections. Slower to see big picture and build insight. Still very much functioning in the “here and now” of children, they are simultaneously growing into the higher level intellectual capacities of an adult (you may see, for example, your teen is very smart but has limited “common sense.”) Under these developmental pressures, teens may feel a disconnect between their strong emotions and how to handle them. They may feel a loss of control and an intense period of change personally and in terms of worldview. They are looking for ways to manage this discomfort and change. But why something like self-harming? One reason is that teens subconsciously use self-harm behavior to ground themselves and assert control. In this capacity, self harming serves to take them out of their spiraling headspace, into the current moment, while giving them a ritual or routine that is all their own. In younger children, we may see behaviors like resistance or regression with toilet training serving a similar function. Remembering our teen’s limited executive functioning and “common sense,” asserting control over ones’ own body is the “low hanging fruit” to manage the chaos of change. They are not rationally selecting a coping skill- rather experimenting with cause-and-effect choices over their own body. Self harm, of course, is not an ideal or healthy coping skill, however it is unfortunately one of the most accessible (control using one’s own body) and biologically very rewarding. Another reason teens self harm is for the biological reward. A natural response, especially in children, to change, chaos and stress is to dissociate or numb themselves. This is a natural built in survival mechanism, but one that most children find unwelcome and depressing over time. In an effort to “feel something again” a teen may turn to self harm. Unfortunately, self harm is very effective in fixing this problem because it causes a natural chemical reward in the brain- another built in biological survival tool- happy hormones are released to offset the physical injury. The combined effect is momentary pain, followed by a rewarding natural chemical rush and temporary relief from numbness. While again this is not a healthy way to reach these goals, knowing the motivations of the behavior can help you introduce the same rewards to your teen in better ways. Some things you need to know about self harm and your creative child: creative kids feel emotions deeply. This can make them more susceptible to finding relief with coping skills that are more extreme (because they are feeling more extremely!) Creative personalities also have the tendency to romanticize suffering- and in a childlike way the self harm can feed into this. Adults have the benefit of life experience to offset some of the romanticism to pain and chaos that children have yet to experience. So when should you worry? We need to remember and balance two important things when it comes to self-harm in our teens: one, self harm as such is not suicidal. If we are indeed talking about self harming behaviors as separate from depression and suicidal thinking, then the goal of self harm is not to actually harm onesself, especially permanently. However, the second thing to remember when it comes to self-harm in our teens is: teens and children are by nature impulsive. They have fewer protective factors, responsibilities, and less life experience to offset risk. As such, any talk of self harm should be taken seriously and immediately precipitate evaluation by a clinician, doctor or other licensed and capable professional. I would introduce a discussion on this topic without also giving you some tools to help your teen. Assuming you have involved a clinician/doctor/licensed professional as part of your process, here are some other recommendations to support them: 1) Talk. To. Them. Ask them questions. Show them love and interest. Show them you are a safe person to go to with your feelings and that you will hold and support them through whatever treatment they need. 2) Creative kids have their best coping skills built in: make art! I have researched and presented on this repeatedly throughout my career and I cannot emphasize this enough: if you have a creative child, they NEED to be creative in order to stay well. 3) It is ok for them to make scary art. If your teen wants to draw, paint, sculpt, write, or otherwise express the intrusive thoughts of self harm or other strong emotions that they are feeling, it is ok and it is healthy. The images or words may seem disturbing to you, but your teen is feeling relief from expressing and communicating them. 4) It is ok for your teen to cry intensely. Again- think of the toddler temper tantrums. Your teen is learning how to manage their growing stressors and strong emotions, and natural releases of emotions will help them be more successful with their coping skills. I know it is hard to do, but allow them a safe space to cry and emote, then be there for them afterwards to support them. 5) It is ok for them to talk about it to others. In the same vein as the emotional expression, talking about it with you, with friends, with other safe people gives your teen a way to make much needed neurological connections to deal with stressors better. 6) Help them find other emotional outlets. This may look like music. Arts. Sports. What helps them feel control over releasing some of the emotions that they are carrying? 7) Give them some control. Find ways to help your teen have control in appropriate ways in their lives. Is their a volunteer project they can participate in that will allow them to feel control and success? Can you let them choose something about their daily routine? Get creative. 8) Teach them mindfulness and grounding. This one, if you aren’t familiar, is a good one for you both to learn together. Try meditating. Try sensory practices together (cooking, hiking, swimming). Help them use soothing objects (pets, blankets, foods, music). The idea is to come out of the racing thoughts in the mind and be fully present in the moment. These are just some ideas and there are many others. The best approach is one collaborative between you, supportive people in your teen’s life, and seasoned professionals to make a diversified team effort that is catered to their individual needs. So, in summary: don’t panic, get help, and with good support better coping skills will be learned to replace this unwanted behavior. If you have concerns about your creative teen and self harm, don’t wait- give me a call- I can help. (C) 2018 Creatively, LLC  Creatives, this week we will continue our discussion of the creative personality and the creative cycle. We are going to dive into the notion of “showing up for creativity.”
Let’s take one step back and revisit the topic of art process vs product. As we are learning how to make art, and again throughout our lifetime as artists, we are very product focused: how does our finished product look, represent our view, our technical skill, the marketplace, the art world, and more? In fact, without discerning between the two, our default view of our art form is likely to be product focused. This is valuable and important, but distinct and different from the process of making art. The process we engage in while making art is connected to neurological creative processes that are grounding, inventive, fulfilling, communicative and even cathartic. Becoming too product focused can disrupt the artistic process, and over investing in the artistic process doesn’t usually create your best product. Depending on the goal, it is useful to more heavily weight or balance these two elements. Assignment due? You are likely to be product focused. Doing art for the therapeutic value? You will need to invest more in the process. The idea of “showing up for creativity” comes from a long held belief by creative people that the spark of creativity or inspiration isn’t constant (remember the creative cycle post?). Oftentimes between these moments of inspiration (which can range from less interest or energy in your creative work to being stuck or blocked creatively) we decide we will wait for that next creative wave to crest before diving back into our work. To “show up for creativity” is the idea that this is backwards: the spark doesn’t organically appear without doing the work. Rather, by continuing to produce work, you will build the momentum and energy back to the moments of inspiration and passion that creative people live for. In other words, the belief is: do not wait for creativity to happen, show up for it every day. This is actually a commonly disputed belief, and unfortunately the evidence for or against the system is by necessity anecdotal. Essentially, like many things in the creative personality, whether or not it works for you to “show up” for your creativity and continue to produce work during inspirational lulls, depends on the unique factors that make you, you. What it does do is give us a concept by which to begin to explore and discuss your creative process, struggles and goals. I am interested in how the adage works for you. How do your creative instincts, protective mechanisms and personal history respond to the concept of “showing up for creativity?” Dare you to test the theory? What I have said before and what my own psychological research has sustained, is that to be happy, fulfilled, resilient and their best self, creative people need to create. Regularly. All the time. This is perhaps one way to make this happen. Many creative people swear by it. So tell me, Creative. How does it strike you? (C) 2018 Creatively, LLC  As artists, we have a unique way of viewing others and the world around us. We communicate this through our work, and it is as cathartic and fulfilling for us as it is exciting and enjoyable for our audience. As a fellow artist, I am interested in exploring this with you. As your therapist, I am also interested in how you view yourself in relationship to the world and others.
In psychology, we talk about a “mental map” as a sort of extension of cognitive mapping. In simple terms, we each have a mental map which we use as reference for how we interact with the world. It is comprised of rules, routines and rituals built from lessons we have learned, people we have interacted with, experiences we have had, and things we have gleaned throughout our personal histories. It is sort of like your personal belief system, but all encompassing, advising how and why each of your behaviors is chosen. I want to take the concept of our unique mental map as a springboard for today’s concept- which I want to call a “referential self.” What I mean by a “referential self” is a version of yourself at a point in time in your life which is significant, and by which you define yourself. You may frequently go back to this version of yourself to assess progress, changes, relationships, decisions and other aspects of growth and development throughout your life. These “referential selves” are frozen in your mind visually and characteristically. In fact, this is a good starting point for identifying what referential selves you may have. Without looking at yourself, imagine yourself. Not what you look like today necessary, but just “you.” How old are you? What are you wearing? Feeling? Can you pinpoint other details about this version of you? You may have more than one mental image which may mean several referential selves. I wonder 2 things for you about these aspects of yourself: 1) what signifies the storage of this version of yourself (eg why this version of you?) and 2) how do you use/judge/see this reference? Take a moment to think about these questions. Is one of your referential selves captured at a moment when you fleshed out important pieces of who you are? Does this version of you have insecurities and flaws that you continue to cling to, even though they may be many years behind you? You may consistently judge yourself or identify yourself as this version of yourself no matter how much you have changed since then. I call this being “stuck” and it is a good concept to explore in therapy. May I suggest the following exercise, as a continuation of self-portrait activities we have previously done together: use your chosen creative modality to explore one of your referential selves. Truly express who this version of yourself was- the good, the bad and the ugly. When you have finished, take a step back (musicians and dancers- you might record your work so you can replay and examine it fully). As objectively as you can, pick apart why this reference is captured and stored (question one above) and how you continue to identify yourself by this version of you (question two above). Go deep. Pull the thread. What did you find? (C) 2018 Creatively, LLC  I have been wanting to talk about this for a few weeks, and today, the timing feels right: let’s explore the creative cycle.
Many things in life operate in cycles. Creativity does, too. In this case, as in many others, by identifying a creative cycle we are simply naming clusters of symptoms and behaviors that tend to occur together to understand them better. That means of course there is variation from person to person, and that the naming is more for communicating and understanding than diagnosing or labeling. Anecdotally, I have observed the following tendencies and stages to be roughly cyclical in my creative clients: Building up of energy Making plans, generating ideas and designs Creation phase Completion and editing phase Sharing and excitement phase Deescalation of energy Lowered creative energy/creative block. This cycle also follows the model of diametrically opposed traits we looked at a few posts back (remember the pair of high/low energy?) Speaking of, Mihaly Csikszentmihalyi also has his five stages of creativity: Preparation (becoming immersed/interested in a topic or problem) Incubation (subconscious marination when we make connections and work on the problem) Insight (“AHA!” Moment) Evaluation (is your newly birthed idea worth following) Elaboration (the most time and energy is spent here- where you do the creative work) Though named and grouped differently, both models generally outline the same cycle: germinate, build, produce, disseminate and ebb. Thinking about this, take a moment to look at where your process might fit into these cycles. Have you been producing lots of ideas and work without a distinct direction? You may be generating/incubating. Landed on a concept but not sure how to produce? Maybe you have your idea and insight and need to push into creation to move forward. If you know where you are in the cycle, you can more easily identify what to do next. You begin to understand and flesh out the nuances of your own creative cycle and therefore how to best operate within it. Start with the basic framework and let it percolate- what is your creative cycle like? Where do you spend the most time within it? What might you want to change about how you move through it? Come sit in my chair and lets explore, problem solve and keep you creating! (C) 2018 Creatively, LLC  This week we will continue to explore traits that are common among creative people- these in particular are part of a category that scientist Mihaly Czikszentmihalyi believes exist in a uniquely, diametrically opposed way. What interests me in this research is partially these qualities as innate to the creative personality, but also this paradoxical tension between naturally occurring opposing forces within. The idea of this as unique to the creative personality speaks ultimately to the drive and power I feel when working with creative people. Without further ado, let’s explore the traits (adapted from “Creativity” by Mihaly Czikszentmihalyi):
So, creative, does any of this sound familiar? Most of it? All of it? Let’s talk more about how these qualities exist within you, and how you can harness them to create your best life. (C) 2018 Creatively, LLC  There are many of us for whom the Winter is hard. The days are short, cold and dark. We are probably inside more, seeing the sun less, and less active. These things can exacerbate or even resurrect mood symptoms that are challenging. Let’s take a few minutes today to talk about how Winter doldrums impact creative people.
We already know that creative people feel things deeply. That means you may feel the onset of a wintertime depression strongly. Creatives- something to remember when you are feeling intense emotions- an engine cannot run on full blast indefinitely. That is to say- the more intense your feelings, the shorter the duration: depressed mood is a wave that will crest and fall. I’m not minimizing the experience or telling you you will wake up one morning “all better.” I am saying stick-and-stay, practice good self care, be around your support system, and know that the pain will naturally ease up on its own a little bit- quicker, better and more completely the better you take care of yourself in the interim. My clinical advice for the Winter doldrums: Dig the hole. Many of you have received this advice from me. Advice that another clinician gave me years ago, I pass along as sound counsel for fighting depression. It is referencing a person whose job it is to dig a hole. Professional hole digger. All this person has to do is show up to work, and the hole gets dug. If the worker doesn’t show up, it doesn’t get dug. This is the attitude we need when symptoms seem overwhelming. Ride the wave. Go through the motions. The more you can stick to your regular routine, implement your usual supports and coping skills and self care, the better you will be for it. I know when you are depressed it takes monumental effort to tie a shoe string. But do it. Go to work. Get to school. Get the kids. Get and do whatever you would usually do- dig the hole. Need more support? Add therapy to help you through this Winter. It’s natural and healthy to add to your support system to counter-balance stressors, and Creatively is here for you. And- don’t forget- 2 art workshops are available at Root Studio (starting soon!) scroll down to previous blog entries for details and offset your doldrums by boosting your creative energy. (C) 2018 Creatively, LLC Dreaming  Perfectionism. We artists know it well. When is a work finished? When is it ready? When is it perfect? This is unsurprisingly also a common issue brought to the therapy chair. The pressure to be perfect seems to be omnipresent in our modern lives. Artists feel this especially strongly when it comes to their work. Caution, creatives: perfection is dangerous, and nonexistent. The reason perfectionism is nonexistent is because it is also relative. As applied to an art form, even more so. Ask yourself, who declares if something is perfect or not? If it is you, where did you get your standard of perfect? What is your reference as to what that means? There is no one perfect painting, dance, writing, or piece of music. The beauty of the creative arts is the variety, not the homogeneity that would be necessary to create a standard of perfection. By trying to achieve something as “perfect” you are limiting yourself and blocking your creative flow. Accepting your art for what it wants to be is a powerful part of expressing it. Some creative therapists will talk about the “imaginal” quality of artwork. This refers to the work existing intrinsically, separately from our own standards, requirements or other cognitive interference. This approach suggests that imaginal work is some of the highest levels of creativity one can achieve. When you are making work, ask yourself what does the work want to become? How is it guiding its own expression in its creation? Does the work want to be more realistic, or more expressive? Does it want to be bold or subdued? Let your choices in creating the work be organically guided by your feelings and instincts as you create. This is the antithesis of the control and obsession of perfectionism. Focus instead on allowing the process to make the work its own. This is ultimate catharsis and expression. I said that perfectionism can be dangerous. Maybe you are a perfectionist in your artwork, but not in other areas of your life (you don’t mind being five minutes late but the horrors if you hit an A if it should have been an A#). I contend that if you adopt a method of perfectionism in your artwork, it will impact other areas of your life, starting with your self esteem. Create art work and fail to meet an impossible standard (we already agree that perfectionism is impossible) and you tell your psyche that you have failed. That you are not good enough. This will also discourage you from being creative- and creating is your life force! Let go of the idea that your work has to be a certain way, and accept it for the way that it is. Then watch as you gradually start to treat and accept yourself in this same way. We are not homogenous, our work is always different, and all that uniqueness in its IMPERFECTION is what makes you (dare I say it) perfect. Here is something to try. Of course, try it as part of your work in your therapy session (don’t exacerbate yourself without this extra layer of support!): I challenge you to do something imperfectly. Not organically, but intentionally “wrong.” In art school I was working on an assignment and drew a life-sized, anatomically perfect, human skeleton. Imagine my shock when my professor told me to take a piece of charcoal and blacken the whole piece out. I want you to do something like this. Make something and then make a big SNAFU. Now breathe. How do you feel? How does your body feel? What are you experiencing? Discomfort? Anger? Anxiety? Breathe through and experience the moment. You did it! You made something “imperfect” and you are ok! After I blackened out my drawing, my professor told me to “push and pull” lightening and darkening the smudges over the drawing, to create a brand new piece. Take your “messed up” work and create something new and different. What does the new piece want to be? Pay attention to your reaction to this new process. Do you feel freedom? Satisfaction? Possibility? This is how creating should feel! Come schedule a session and let’s talk about how you are impacted by perfectionism. Let’s get unstuck. Let’s get creatively free. Let’s create your best life. © 2017 Creatively, LLC  Transference is a phenomena in psychology in which we project on people expectations and judgments based on past experiences. Sometimes it is age related, other times gender, it can be as simple as how someone looks or speaks, or something different altogether. It is something that, as counselors, we are very aware of and try to prepare for. Will we remind a patient of a significant other? An ex? A parent? A friend? Even though we know that you know that we are not that person, subconsciously, you may still treat us differently based on the transference. For example, I remind a child of an adult she doesn’t trust, so she is less likely to talk to me during session.
Transference is how you feel about me. Countertransference, is how I feel about you back. As human beings, of course we react to each other. You react to me based on your experiences and I react back to you based on mine. We both respond to our treatment of each other. Together, transference and countertransference can be both powerful tools or destructive forces in a therapeutic relationship. Transference and countertransference exist in more than just a therapeutic setting. They are clinical-speak for how we all react and interact to each other every day. My new boss reminds me of an old boss so I’m cautious. A new friend reminds you of a bad relationship so you take your time. There are endless occurrences in our daily lives. I had an employer in my college days who explained to me his “Mirror theory,” in which he believed that generally people feel about you the way you feel about them. Thinking about transference and countertransference, this may often be true! How do transference and countertransference apply to you as a creative person? Studies have shown that people are drawn to creative personalities. The unique ways of thinking and seeing the world that are innate to you, are attractive to others. This is a part of what draws people to your creative works as well. Additionally, research indicates that creative people, when in the presence of other creative people, can transfer creative energy to each other in a positive way. So we see that our judgements about others are natural and based on our experiences. In turn, these impact their experiences of us and our relationships together. Creatively, our personalities are exciting and magnetic, and a good way to recharge those creative batteries is to get together with other creative people. Creativity isn’t just what you do, it is who you are! The more you learn about your creative personality, the more you will begin to understand the healing and positive impact it has on you and those around you. It is how you live your best life! (c) 2017 CREATIVELY, LLC  It seems appropriate, during this time of year as we transition from Summer weather and schedules to Fall with a new school year and more, to discuss change. Specifically, dear creatives, how it applies to you and your creative personality. Creativity has been heavily researched in recent years and is often divided into several categories of interest- one of which is the creative personality. Some of my favorite research on the subject is by Mihaly Czsikszentmihalyi. In his work Creativity: The Work and Lives of 91 Eminent People, published in 1996, Cziskszentmihalyi talks about personality traits of creatives. Many of the traits he lists exhibit a type of dual nature: e.g. being both introverted and extroverted, or both high energy and reserved. In this case, both averse to and seeking change. For you, that means during a time of year such as this you may feel both energized and fatigued by change. Creativity is often related to novelty, and so it follows that change can give you new ideas and energy and be exciting. However, creative people tend to be very passionate people and so with change comes risk of new things that are either good or bad- and felt deeply in both cases. You may be excited for the changing seasons and new things this time of year may bring your way, while also feeling uneasy about the unknown. What to do? Unsurprisingly, I will of course always encourage you to be creative. Make new work, engage in your creative process and express the new emotions and ideas that come with change. Capitalize on the new energy and use it to temper any more negative feelings. Be careful and don't assume that “bad” is always “bad”- things are rarely all-or-nothing and tend to fall somewhere in between- looked at the right way, most things for you can be inspiring. Do you know for sure something is coming up this Fall that you are not looking forward to? This is also a natural part of life that your creative personality has strengths to help you overcome. Explore your feelings about change and this transitional time of year in your next therapy session, and learn more about how these themes apply to you! (c) 2017 CREATIVELY, LLC  There are many types of creative therapies: dance therapy, art therapy, drama therapy and more- this post does not summarize these approaches- rather it describes the uses of the creative process that research (including my own) has shown is important and effective in mental wellness and healing.
I have said this before- and I will say it more!- creative people need to create. It is your most powerful tool in life, and your most valuable asset in staying well. Creativity in therapy asks you to explore your own experience of things including your feelings, thoughts and imagination. The focus is on making and expressing what comes from inside you, rather than perfect depictions of what you can already see. Your creative process becomes a healing experience when used therapeutically. Drawing, painting, dancing, writing and other art forms are powerful ways to communicate. They have been used to record human history, ideas, feelings, and dreams. They show a wide range of emotions from joy to sorrow, triumph to trauma. Creative arts have served as a way of understanding, making sense, and clarifying inner experiences without words. Used therapeutically, these are activities to soothe you, release stress and tension, give enjoyment and rise above troubling feelings.The process of creating may help you express fear, anxiety and other stressful emotions. It touches the soul or spirit. While family, work and other parts of life may fulfill you, creative experiences can help you express or understand parts of yourself that other activities and interactions cannot. Creative people usually feel better and happier about themselves and their lives during and after being creative. Creating helps you be more flexible in problem solving and makes you more insightful and true to yourself. Creating and communicating in a meaningful way are necessary for psychological, physical and spiritual health. A common worry about creativity as therapy is that you are not creating something that is good enough. You may worry that if you don’t create a product up to your usual standards, creative therapy won’t work and you have somehow failed. The purpose of creativity in therapy is not to make great art: it is to experience the process of creating. This is likely a shift in how you conceptualize your creative experiences, and an important distinction. Remember, creative artist, that when you are creating therapeutically it is the journey and not the destination that is important. There are many more words of wisdom on this topic- creative therapy ideas and exercises, creative personalities, creatives and mental wellness- more on these to come! Subscribe to the Creatively newsletter on the home page, and never miss a thing. © 2017 CREATIVELY, LLC |
the Creativity blogCreative exercises, psychoeducation, therapy skills, practice updates and more. Want updates in a newsletter? Go to the homepage to subscribe, and don't miss a thing. Cindy Cisnerosis a Creativity Coach, Creativity Counselor and Professional Artist in Sykesville, Maryland. She provides Online Creativity Counseling in Maryland and Virginia, and Online Creativity Coaching throughout the USA, Canada and the UK. The information provided in this blog is from my own clinical experiences and training. It is intended to supplement your clinical care. Never make major life changes before consulting with your treatment team. If you are unsure of your safety or wellbeing, do not hesitate to get help immediately.
Archives
May 2022
|
RSS Feed
|
Creativity Counseling in Maryland and Virginia
Creativity Coaching Worldwide including the USA, UK and Canada |
|
Telephone443-741-2294
|
|